Murtzfest 2012

We’re nearing the end of August and while it’s always sad to see summer on its way out, you can’t help but love all the end-of-summer festivals, parties and events. Some people mark the end of summer with the opening of the CNE, but we have another annual summer event that is almost as iconic – Murtzfest.

Arguably the biggest party of the year, Murtzfest is the annual birthday celebration of celebrity journalist Murtz Jaffer. Held in a swanky night club, Murtzfest has a renowned reputation for surprise celebrity guests, a strict purple dress code, lots of booze and a VIP guest list ready to party. You can start to piece together the theatrics that take place year after year.

Continuing the 13-year legacy, Murtzfest 2012 took place on Friday, August 17 at Cheval (606 King Street West) in celebration of Murtz’s 32nd birthday and we made an appearance to check out the scene. We arrived just after 11pm in purple dresses with a few Frescarias in our system. The place was just waking up, but there was the birthday boy looking sharp in his pinstripe shirt and trademark purple fedora.

In a strange but welcomed turn of the tables, he offered to buy us our first drinks of the night. With easy access to the bar we were able to keep those drinks coming, ensuring our social tolerance was in suitable shape.

The long trough-like venue quickly filled up as more people shuffled in, providing ample entertainment for wandering, observing eyes. Spotted: a young Bret Hart, the wanna-be cast of Jersey Shore, a socially inept boy-in-a-suit who wandered aimlessly around all night not speaking to anyone, a bartender who re-served our returned already sipped drinks (he messed up the order after bragging about how well he can read lips) to two other girls beside us and of course, way too many douchebags.

Admittedly, we have not set foot in a club in years and that night was a blatant reminder why. No matter how low cut or tight our dresses were we were still wearing far more material than what was apparently acceptable. And although it is the norm in places like that, paying $10 for watered down juice with a splash of booze is insulting to our existence. We need our drinks good and stiff to survive a night in a place like that. And please don’t get me started on the music.

Needless to say, it takes a hell of a man to get us to go to a party like that, but Murtz, for you, we’ll happily give you the gift of our company year after year no matter what ridiculous place we end up in. Happy Birthday! Hope it was amurtzing.

pictures (c)murtzfest